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Redefining Beauty: Learning to See Yourself Through a Kinder Lens
By Lisa Hartie, Founder of A Beautiful Woman
From the moment we’re little girls, we’re surrounded by ideas about what beauty “should” look like. Magazines, films, and even casual comments from strangers start shaping our understanding long before we’re old enough to question it.
As a mother, I’ve watched people comment on my daughter’s appearance from the time she could barely talk. And I remember my own experiences — sitting with friends in school, each of us secretly wondering if we were “enough.”
We were smart, funny, and full of potential. Yet every one of us compared ourselves to an image that didn’t truly exist.
Why We Struggle to Feel Beautiful
The media shows us thousands of images of women every single day. Most fit one narrow definition — young, thin, flawless — and it’s no wonder so many of us end up questioning our own reflection.
That constant exposure quietly teaches us to link our worth to how we look. To believe that beauty equals value.
But here’s the truth: beauty isn’t one size, shape, or age. It isn’t filtered or airbrushed. Real beauty lives in your expressions, your laugh lines, your energy, your kindness — and it can’t be captured in a glossy ad.
Letting go of old definitions takes courage, awareness, and a touch of rebellion. But it’s absolutely possible.
1. Question Where Those Beauty Rules Come From
Freedom begins with awareness. Start by noticing the messages you see every day — in advertising, on social media, even casual conversations.
Ask yourself: Who benefits when I doubt my beauty?
When you remind yourself that many of those images are designed to sell products, not to celebrate women, their power starts to fade. The more you practice this, the less you’ll find yourself comparing.
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2. Surround Yourself with Real Beauty
Spend time with women who radiate confidence and kindness. Look closely and you’ll see — they come in every shape, size, and age.
The friends who inspire me most are vibrant, creative, and full of life. None of them fit the so-called “perfect” mold — and that’s exactly what makes them breathtaking.
When I notice their strength, laughter, and authenticity, I’m reminded that beauty looks like us.
3. Feel Good — Then Look in the Mirror
True beauty glows from within. It shows up when you’re rested, when your skin is cared for, when you’re living fully — laughing, loving, and doing what lights you up.
That natural radiance can’t be faked or filtered. It’s your unique life energy, shining through your skin, your eyes, your smile.
Next time you feel joyful or peaceful — maybe you’re walking in the sunshine, creating something new, or simply feeling grateful — take a moment and look at your reflection.
The woman looking back at you is strong, irreplaceable, and truly beautiful.
Defining Beauty for Yourself
Over time, I stopped chasing impossible ideals and started creating my own definition of beauty — one rooted in self-respect, self-care, and confidence.
That’s what A Beautiful Woman is all about. It’s not about covering up who you are; it’s about enhancing what’s already there — your natural glow, your vitality, and your spirit.
Because the truth is simple: you are beautiful now. And every chapter of your life adds more depth, more warmth, and more radiance to that beauty.
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